My Love
by Ruusukainen
Summary: Ryan wrote a letter to the love of his life.


**A/N - **The song in the end is called _Graduation (Friends Forever)_ and it's by Vitamin C.

**Summary - **Ryan wrote a letter to the love of his life.

**Disclaimer -** I don't own anything.

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**My Love**

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Ryan Atwood sat on the bed in his new house. He could hear his kids screaming in downstairs and his wife yelling after them.

He looked at the stack of boxes in front of him. There were one box that caught Ryan's eye. He took it and placed it on his lap. He opened the cover and looked inside. Then it hit him.

This was the box he kept memories of Marissa. His first love. He hadn't seen that box in years. Not since the day he decided to forget it, to move on with his life.

He looked inside the box. There were pictures and stuff that once belonged to Marissa. Ryan smiled and picked up a photo. It was taken on the night they were all together. The Fantastic Four. It could still be fantastic, but it'll never be four again.

Ryan put the photo down and picked up a letter. It was signed on the day when Marissa's funeral had been.

_Marissa,_

_I know I don't usually say much, but in this one, I'm gonna tell you how I feel, for once._

_You're gone. I still cant believe it, it happened so fast. I had no change to say goodbye to you. We had ups and downs, but I never wanted you to die._

_I miss you. I don't regret that I had a change to spend your last moments with you. I'm not the only one who you left behind. Your family loves you. Even when you're gone, they still care about you._

_I believe that you are in a better place. You're up on a cloud in a white, beautiful dress. You have a peaceful smile across your face and you look happier than you've ever been. That thought makes me smile and Seth always asks what there is to smile about. I truly believe that you're watching over us._

_This makes me think. What would our life have been if we had stayed together? I think we would be married and have many gorgeous kids. I would have a terrible mother in law, no matter what. That's what you would think anyway. I still don't know why you kept saying those things about your mom. I mean, at least she's not the one who hits or says bad things about you every day. You were very lucky to have a mother like Julie. _

_Right now I'm sitting on my bed in the pool house. In a building that keeps in so many moments of us. From the good and bad, happy and sad times. I miss those days._

_You had so many things in your life that you really had to fight against. I'm sorry for that. So many of them were truly my fault. _

_Then there is that night. The night that took you away from us. I'm feeling truly responsible for that, too. And again, I'm sorry. If I hadn't come in your life couple of years ago, your life would have been so much easier._

_So, how am I gonna be sure that you get this? I think Seth would suggest that we'll put Superman on the business. That would just be embarrassing. I planned that I'll put this in a bottle and throw it into the ocean. But there was one problem, I didn't found any bottles. So, I'm gonna put this in the box where I keep things of you. You know, memories._

_I still believe that I'll never truly forget you. Wherever I'll go you will be in my thoughts with me._

_And I'll love you until the day I die. Then I hope I'll be on that cloud with you laughing with our friends and family. Keep that in mind._

_Goodbye my Love._

_Ryan._

Ryan felt a burning tear escape from the corner of his eye. He had totally forgot the letter and was surprised to find it. It sounded so much better after couple of years. It was a total chlisee but it was still good. That was the first letter Ryan had ever written to anybody.

But even after all, he had never forgot Marissa. He had a family now, but not the one he had wanted with her. His life was now so good that it coul never get any better.

So why not make the most of it?

_Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?  
Can we survive it out there?  
Can we make it somehow?  
I guess I thought that this would never end,  
And suddenly it's like we're women and men.  
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?  
Will these memories fade when I leave this town?  
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye.  
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly._

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End file.
